Friday, September 27, 2013

Pikes Peak Highway

As I drive on the steep winding road to the top of Pikes Peak, just past Glen Cove at 11,500 feet, I can finally pass the Kansas Flatlander I have trailed for five miles. As I finish passing—"Oh-Oh"—a ranger walks to the center of the road with upraised hand. I stop. "Sir, please don't pass on a double line."

"Sorry. I didn't see it," holding back my indignation—after all—I had learned to drive on Montana mountain roads where the only driving guideline was Reasonable and Prudent.

"I'm here with this herd of mountain sheep," she said, looking toward the herd and group of people holding binoculars....

"Thank you," I said—and continued to the top to meet my cousins arriving via the cog railway.

After my cousins depart down the mountain, I begin my journey down the highway; this is the main reason I drove up—to test my car brakes on the way down. Years ago at Glen Cove, where rangers do a brake check, our Caravan hubcaps measured 450 degrees, and our family and van were fortunately quarantined for half an hour.

I drive our 2010 Camry with a hybrid engine. The hybrid is the unknown; how well will it do in the descent? It features dynamic braking: The electric engine morphs into a generator pumping energy back into the huge battery—slowing down the car. Depressing the brake pedal seldom activates the real brakes; rather, it pumps energy into the battery—at least on flat land. I set the shift lever to "B" for "Engine Braking."

As I approach Glen Cove—"Oh-Oh"—I see the ranger I met on the way up is going to check my brakes on the way down. I stop. From her hip, she aims a laser/infrared gun at my wheel, double checks her reading, and says, "Wow, 125 degrees. That's just from your tires warming. You are welcome back anytime."

"I'm the double yellow line guy."

"Yah, I know."

With no one behind me, we discuss my dynamic braking, how poorly she says the Prius-hybrid braking performs, mountain sheep…and more…until a car approaches from behind.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Warning Sign

As I drive north on I-25 behind a semi-trailer stacked to the sky with crushed cars, I can't read its 18" x 18" sign until I get within 20 feet:

CAUTION!
DO NOT FOLLOW CLOSER THAN 300 FEET.
NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR BROKEN WINDSHIELDS.

Friday, September 20, 2013

Jimmy John's

Today, Friday at noon, I stalled in Garden of the Gods Boulevard gridlock--fifteen minutes to inch by two blocks. The beat up car ahead of me sported a suction-cup sign on the roof: JIMMY JOHN'S SANDWICHES--FREAKY FAST DELIVERY.

Old Technology

This morning as the old man (about my age) walked by our house, a talk show blared from the 1950's salmon-colored Bakelite-plastic five-transistor radio he held--with its antenna fully extended.

Thursday, September 12, 2013

The Minister

Promptly at 7:30 every Saturday morning, at the long table near the fireplace in Panera's, a minister leads five to ten men in a lively Bible study.

When I arrived yesterday for coffee at 6:45, the minister had claimed the table—adding smaller tables at each end. While waiting, he distributed handouts and reviewed his heavily tabbed and marked up Bible.

When 7:30 arrived, the minister sat alone. Twenty minutes later, he picked up his Bible and materials, put the borrowed tables back where he had found them, and left.

The Combination Lock

When the wiry white-haired senior walks into the locker room, he always uses the second locker from the wall, hangs his backpack from the top locker hook, lays out his gym clothes in order, dresses, places his glasses on top of the locker, weighs himself, records his weight in a spiral notebook, puts his glasses back on, slips on his workout gloves and I-pod, drapes a folded white towel over his left shoulder, secures his locker with a combination lock, twists the dial first clockwise, pauses, twists it a full turn counter-clockwise to the number 12 ½--and then leaves for the gym.